I think loving yourself is one of the most important traits a person can master.
Selfishness is so looked down upon that we forget there is a healthy kind of selfish.
We come into this world alone, and we leave it alone, and many times while here we have to be alone, so it’s important to figure out how to fill and enjoy that alone time.
This isn’t easy – I’ll tell you right now – the only places I go are school and work because I don’t have any friends to go out with.
I typically don’t go to movies unless my sister is available or I am invited by colleagues from work or people I know from college, because I’m embarrassed to go alone. I’m uncomfortable. It’s the same with going out to eat – I want to try new restaurants, but alone? Never. I would much rather get McDonalds from the drive thru and eat it at home if I’m going to eat alone.
I really want to take a cooking class, but again, I would like to have a friend to take with me.
I’m not sure why that is. I honestly can’t say why I have an issue with doing these things alone. Is anyone in the movie theater really going to care that I’m sitting there alone? Is the waitress going to look down on me because I’m eating alone? Doubtful.
My sister was talking to me the other day about a new person she met and about how great they are, but when talking about herself she says she is clumsy and awkward and that’s when it really reasonated with me how important loving yourself is.
It’s fine to think another person is great and that you are lucky to know them, but you should also feel that they are lucky to know you. You should have more strengths to share about yourself than weaknesses. You should feel you deserve good friendships and relationships rather than feeling that you’re so lucky someone wants to spend time with you. You’re not lucky – you deserve it!
If there is something you want to do and you can’t find anyone to do it with you, do it alone. Experience something. Learn something. Enjoy your own company.
Do you think you’re funny? Do you think you’re smart? Pretty? Brave? Happy?
Take pride in these qualities.
Challenge this week: each day when you wake up, spend 5 minutes complimenting yourself in the mirror.
I am beautiful. I am brave. I am kind. I am special. I am intelligent.
Whatever you come up with that is true for you.
You don’t have to do this loudly, nobody has to know you’re doing it, but try it, and see what a difference this makes in your self confidence.
When you feel even a tiny bit more confident, try doing one of those activities you’re usually afraid to try alone. I’m going to try too- and I’ll update you on the progress.
Remember: you are loved, and you’re doing fine. You’re exactly where you need to be.