What Do You Want?

Most of us fear failure, but have you ever thought that you might also fear success?

I used to dream about being a pop star. When I went to college for music, I was surrounded with more talented people with the same dream. I would write 1 song in the time my roommate would write 5, and the guy down the hall would write 10.

I felt inadequate.

I started thinking, what if nobody likes my music? What if they hate my voice? What if I spend my life trying to get into this business and never make it?

That was the failure.

But I believed in myself. I kept at it.

Then came fear of success.

What if I make it?

What if people love my music? What if I get to go on tour? What if I can buy my parents a house? … Will I get to have a family? Will I like living on the road 90% of the time? Can I handle the spotlight? Can I deal with the criticism? What if I regret it? I’m comfortable with the way things are…do I really want them to change?

It’s a strange feeling… fearing success. It’s gripping. More so than fear of failure. Being afraid to fail motivates me to try to prove myself wrong…but being afraid to succeed gives me a reason not to try.

If you’re afraid to succeed, evaluate what it is you actually want, and why you want it. You may find that you don’t like your reasoning, and your true desires are in a completely different direction.

Listen to yourself. Evaluate your fear.

What do you want?